Mary Winters...

Mary Winters is writing a bible study about the Garden of Eden.  The following paragraph is from her work and it applies well to marriages.  If one person in a marriage relationship is willing to stand with Jesus, it has tremendous influence.

When a believer in Jesus chooses to act out the will of the Father, act out the Word of God, speak out the Word of God, or to remain in love, patience, gentleness, self-control etc… instead of reacting in the flesh with anger etc…., this releases the Holy Spirit into the atmosphere and into others.  It displaces thedarkness and displaces the lies of the darkness.

What do you think?  How is this the "difference maker" in conflict?

Marriage Out of Alignment?

DAVID NOTES: The kinds of problems that bring couples to crisis aren’t always clear in the beginning. Think of an automobile that is out of alignment, having hit a pothole or a speed bump too fast. At first, it may just steer slightly to the right, but over time the right tires will begin to bald, and then unforeseen problems arise. When our marriages are out of alignment, they don’t perform well. Just like an automobile, marriages need consistent tuning, maintenance and care—sometimes you even need to consult with an expert to correct a problem! But it isn’t only the misaligned tires or the belts worn from every day use that benefit from our time and attention; the entire vehicle might be capable of performing in ways we never imagined. Imagine yourself behind the wheel of an exotic sports car. Would you know how to get peak performance and driving pleasure from the car without taking the time to learn and appreciate the performance “sweet spots?” Most likely, it would require training, expertise, and study of the design and operations manual—along with practice—to unleash the performance potential of the machine. Consider this little book an owner’s manual to the awesome potential within your marriage relationship.

"God is good, and He is good at being God"

Sally Says...

Faith is something that will never stop growing stronger in you as you continue and persevere at “walking” with Him.  Faith is a muscle that strengthens with learning, adversity, sacrifice, and risk as you wisely obey His call and His direction.  “Belief” in something is a heart/head knowledge and acceptance.  Faith is ‘acting' on the promises and directives of the God who you “believe” in, and His Word that you “believe” in.  It’s not just talking about your beliefs, but walking them out.  Faith is active. It is acting like God is telling the truth…adapting your behavior, your decisions, and basically your whole lifestyle to what God has asked you to do.  it often requires risk, but a risk that requires wisdom.  We must know His truth to know how to step out in faith.  The enemy is working overtime to keep you too busy or too fearful to take the risk.  Don’t let him distract you. God is not worried about His reputation; you do not have to protect it; He is BIG enough to show off His glory and pour out His blessings as we walk with Him in faith, trusting He will do what He says He will do.

Faith does not control God.  It doesn’t make God do something or not do something.  It gives us “access" to what God has ALREADY intended to do for us!  Faith does not focus on how strong “our belief" is, but it focuses on how trustworthy, true, and loyal HE is. It’s directed at and rooted in a “good God”. "God is good, and He is good at being God". If you tend to struggle in moving forward in obedience to God and His word, you do not need “bigger" faith….you need a BIGGER God.  Your level of faith will always be tied to your perception of God.  We need an accurate and honest view of the faithfulness of our God.  And we, as women especially, need to move forward in faith despite what our feelings tell us.  Don’t let your feelings overshadow your level of faith.  We must walk BY HIS WORD and not let the enemy confuse, distract, discourage, disappoint, and frighten us, thereby wearing us down and watering down what we know to be true. You can know by the way you ‘act’ whether or not you are walking out and taking up the shield of faith.

A woman who extinguishes the fiery darts of the enemy with her Shield of Faith “chooses" to live with a steadfast confidence in the Lord and His promises.  She “walks" onward in accordance with the truth revealed in His Word, and she “pushes” past her fears and/or doubts which the enemy uses to try to paralyze her in insecurity.  

“Know therefore that the Lord your God is God; He is the faithful God, keeping His covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love Him and keep His commands.” (Deut 7:9)

Our righteousness is not something we manufacture...

Our righteousness is not something we manufacture.  It is something that is “put" inside us (it is imputed by the Holy Spirit) when we believe, and it is something that must be “released” outward and onward.  It is the Holy Spirit who works in and through us to do this.  He convicts us, teaches us, grows us.  Our job is to be sensitive to His guidance and continue to align our lives with God’s expectations and will. Righteousness is walking out what is already in us. Unrighteousness is walking out what is of the flesh, and not the Spirit.  When we choose to sin (which is often easier than choosing not to) we are quenching the work of the Spirit in us.  Continued “unright” living breeds an environment for enemy infiltration.  We must “intentionally” protect our mind, will, emotions, conscience (our soul—where our heart lies) from what is not “right” with the breastplate of what is.  We are “putting on” the “new self”—the self that is aligned with the Light of the World.  It should start to feel very comfortable on us.  Imputed righteousness is a once in a lifetime action happening at our profession of faith and belief in Jesus Christ as the Son of God.  Practical righteousness is a moment-by-moment, day-by-day choice and action.  It is our living out what’s in us.  God’s Holy Spirit takes the responsibility to renew us and work His righteousness through us.  Whew, that is so good!  He is renewing our minds, realigning our passions and attitudes, and giving us strength to live in a way that is pleasing to Him and a blessing to others.   Sally Abbott

Good Vibrations? Why not?

I like the “vibe” I get when I go into a Starbuck’s coffee shop, or when I listen to certain music. Or said another way, I like what I sense and experience about a Starbuck’s, and enjoy what I feel about that certain music. Like the Beach Boys sing in their 1960s hit, “Good Vibrations”, I pick up good vibrations.

We don’t just sense or feel places and people in our environment; we also “vibrate” our own feelings that others around us experience. And that “vibe” comes out of the beliefs we hold as truths.

If your spouse or children were to choose a ringtone that describes the “vibe” you emanate, what would it be?

Psalm 139:23-24 (NIV)

Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.

See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.

Created For More – Consider the Emotions that you House

At a specific time in history, God purposefully used his mind, will and creative powers to fashion all of the intricate parts that make up your unique personality, hair color, ring finger size – everything. Psalm 139:14 tells us that His works are wonderful and that WE KNOW it full well.  Each of us has an innate understanding that we house something unique and special with potential to do great things.  We are made in the image of God and the distinctiveness in our makeup reflects His glory.

In the Garden of Eden, before sin entered into the heart of man, Adam and Eve lived harmoniously with God and each other.

But when sin entered into the heart of man, Adam and Eve were banished from the Garden of Eden, and congruence with God was interrupted. Man inherited a sinful nature within himself that causes him to wrestle between right and wrong, or good and evil.

Transformation of a man’s heart occurs when man is reconciled with God through Jesus Christ and confronts his sinful nature by yielding his will to the leadership of the Holy Spirit. 

Man was designed to live in harmony with God. But man’s sin has thrust him outside that harmony, into living with his own sinful nature, creating confusion about how to meet his own needs. This neediness causes man to act out in harmful ways, resulting in pain and heartache for self and others. If your heart could speak, would it reveal any pain or confusion about self, or the meaning of life?

Emotional wounds and the lies attached to those wounds can prevent a person from:

Knowing the true self because of a false self or false set of beliefs

Taking risks and growing to become all that Christ intends

Living in the moment and experiencing the wonder and joy of life

Making a difference and contributing to society and the kingdom of God

Life as God intends for His Creation

The Lord wants to kill the man of sin inside your heart. He wants to KILL sin just like a cancer patient wants to kill the cancer cells. Kill is a strong word that means to end life. We have to first become aware of the emotional cancer cells in our hearts and then be willing to do WIT, “whatever it takes” to kill them; it requires work to expose the wounds in our hearts (and the false messages attached to them) to enable our replacing the lies with God’s truth.

That work is a battle in your heart to kill sin, but until you can SEE it, you will not treat it. A person does not receive treatment for cancer if there is nothing to indicate its presence. But when the cancer manifests itself through symptoms, that person takes immediate action to establish a treatment plan.

Physical cancer is a menace that no one wants to face. The word “cancer” captures a person’s attention, and creates the willingness to do WIT, “whatever it takes” to get rid of it. Physical cancer is to the body as unhealed emotional wounds are to the heart: untreated emotional wounds lead to spiritual death just like untreated cancer causes physical death. A prudent person has regular checkups to make sure cancerous division and multiplication is not ravaging his/her body. God tells us to DAILY allow His Holy Spirit to inspect our hearts, to see if there is anything that is displeasing to Him, and to see if there is any lie in our heart caused by an emotional wound that is robbing us of His glory and truth.

However, people live for years with depression, unsatisfying relationships, internal pain and suffering, and will go to huge lengths to hide these symptoms either out of fear of being discovered as “less than or not enough”, or simply lack of knowledge about how to be set free from internal pain.

Where is emotional pain?

In your heart.

Where do we invite Christ to live?

In our hearts.

We are all in need of a Savior to love and redeem us.

Keeping emotional pain at bay is like trying to keep a beach ball submerged under water; it takes constant energy and will never succeed. But, when exposed - or brought into the light - that pain or darkness will lose its power.

So what is the solution?

Dr. Phil says you cannot change what you will not acknowledge.

Jesus Christ says to confess your sins so that you may be healed.

Honesty leads to getting well. It is that simple. Once you discover lies that have become your beliefs that keep you from living in freedom, you can identify your heart battle, and can work to replace those lies with God’s truth.

When false beliefs are keeping you from experiencing the joy of your salvation, you are being denied the glory for which you were created.

Traveling on the Road to Restoration

In Rick Warren’s book, The Purpose Driven Life, he says, “we were created by God and for God and until you figure that out, life isn’t going to make sense.”

Our lives here on earth are about being restored to man’s original state of innocence and embracing our distinctiveness to bring glory to God.  We can certainly experience joy and happy times on earth, but God’s ultimate goal is to remake us into His image, allowing us to step into the glory for which we were created, to experience and have the influence He always intended.  Nothing can possibly be more satisfying than returning to who we were created to be, and living from that place in intimate relationship with the Lord.  As we confess Jesus Christ as Lord of our lives, our hearts become burdened for those who are lost without an eternal vision or purpose; part of our purpose is to show them God’s love and provision. 

There are two primary forces that inspire change in our lives:  pain and vision.  It is against our nature to experience pain (makes sense) and we will do whatever we can to find relief.  We also are motivated to change through vision, seeing something that appeals to us or gives our lives meaning, purpose or pleasure, and will move us to attain it.  These two phenomena are always active in our lives - responding to vision and managing pain.  Rick Warren explains it this way, “I used to think that life was hills and valleys - you go through a dark time, then you go to the mountaintop, back and forth.  I don’t believe that anymore.  Rather than life being hills and valleys, I believe that it’s kind of like two rails on a railroad track, and at all times you have something good and something bad in your life.  No matter how good things are in your life, there is always something bad that needs to be worked on.  And no matter how bad things are in your life, there is always something good you can thank God for.”

Healthy individuals understand that life is a process of responding to challenges that will develop greater character, usually involving pain.  We are all familiar with the adage, “no pain, no gain.”  Another aspect of growth is dealing with negative emotions that have been repressed from the past.  Children are not responsible for, and do not know how to process pain from their childhood; many times this pain is contained in the body until maturity enables processing it.  Much like a cyst encapsulates foreign matter in the body, humans have tendencies to fragment and encapsulate emotions. Those protected emotions are submerged into the subconscious so they can continue with their lives (essentially, this is a survival technique).  It takes energy to keep past memories submerged and over time, this can cause a person to experience depression and other emotional health issues.

Denying that your heart has been wounded (and will continue to be wounded by imperfect people in an imperfect world) is like saying you are invincible. In fact, you have the same needs as anyone else and will suffer when your needs are overlooked, criticized, thwarted, etc.  Part of your responsibility as an adult is to learn what your needs are and take responsibility for getting them met.  A child does not have the sophistication to mentally articulate his or her needs or have the understanding or ability to meet them.  Even the best parents miss the mark in meeting all their child’s needs because we are all limited in this ability.

The Lord makes provision for the process of unraveling negative emotions; He exhorts us to allow the Holy Spirit to regularly search our heart and bring those bruised places into the light so they can be healed.  Our tendency is to deny that we have hurts in our hearts because we somehow surmise that admitting our pain and neediness makes us substandard or less than others who “seem to have it all together.”  Healthy individuals see the process of honestly assessing themselves as a slice of the pie chart that represents the complete self.  They don’t allow themselves to drown in self pity and morbid self absorption, but they do “deal with” the weak parts of themselves and the hurting parts, which pleases God and allows them to reach resolution. 

Is there a step you can take today that will move you towards resolution?